Adult Son's Failure to Reciprocate for Meals in Family

The biblical concept of a stubborn and rebellious son is rooted in Deuteronomy 21:18-20, which describes a son who does not obey his parents and is considered a glutton and a drunkard ^{[1, 3]}. This passage outlines the conditions under which a son can be considered stubborn and rebellious, including his refusal to listen to his parents and his excessive consumption of food and drink.

In Jewish tradition, the concept of a stubborn and rebellious son is further developed in the Babylonian Talmud and the Mishnah. According to the Talmud, a son is considered stubborn and rebellious if he steals from his father and eats on someone else's property ^[12]. The Mishnah also outlines specific conditions for determining whether a son is stubborn and rebellious, including the amount of food and drink he consumes ^[14].

The Talmud also discusses the issue of an adult son's dependence on his father's support. According to Rabbi Yoḥanan, an adult son who is dependent on his father's table is considered a minor in this context and is expected to reciprocate by giving his father any items he finds ^[5]. This highlights the importance of familial obligations and reciprocity in Jewish tradition.

In contrast, the Patristic tradition emphasizes the importance of honoring one's parents and living a virtuous life. Augustine's writings on marriage and family emphasize the duty of children to obey their parents and the importance of living a life of temperance and restraint ^[4].

The biblical narrative also provides examples of sons who fail to reciprocate or honor their parents. For instance, Absalom's rebellion against David is seen as a failure to honor his father ^{[2, 8]}. Similarly, the parable of the prodigal son in Luke 15 highlights the tension between the prodigal son and his elder brother, who refuses to acknowledge his brother's return ^[9].

The issue of an adult son's failure to reciprocate for meals in the family is not directly addressed in the biblical text. However, the Jewish tradition provides some insight into this issue. According to the Mishnah, an adult son who is supported by his father is considered legally competent and can waive his rights ^[10]. The Talmud also discusses the distribution of inheritance among adult and minor sons, suggesting that they receive equal shares and manage their own needs ^[13].

In conclusion, the concept of an adult son's failure to reciprocate for meals in the family is rooted in biblical and Jewish traditions that emphasize the importance of familial obligations and reciprocity. While the biblical text does not directly address this issue, the Jewish tradition provides guidance on the responsibilities of adult sons towards their parents.

Familial Obligations in Jewish Tradition

The Jewish tradition places significant emphasis on familial obligations, including the responsibility of children to honor their parents. The Talmud and Mishnah outline specific guidelines for determining when a son is considered stubborn and rebellious, and the consequences that follow ^{[6, 11]}.

The concept of reciprocity is also central to Jewish tradition. An adult son who is dependent on his father's support is expected to reciprocate by giving his father any items he finds ^[5]. This highlights the importance of mutual support and respect within the family.

The distribution of inheritance among adult and minor sons is also guided by Jewish tradition. According to the Talmud, adult and minor sons receive equal shares of the inheritance and manage their own needs ^[13].

The Patristic tradition, while not directly addressing the issue of an adult son's failure to reciprocate, emphasizes the importance of honoring one's parents and living a virtuous life ^{[4, 7]}.

The biblical narrative provides examples of sons who fail to honor their parents, highlighting the consequences of such actions ^{[2, 8, 9]}.

In the context of these traditions, an adult son's failure to reciprocate for meals in the family can be seen as a failure to fulfill his familial obligations and demonstrate respect for his parents.

Sources

Deuteronomy “Deuteronomy 21:18 (BSB) — If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who does not obey his father and mother and does not listen to them when disciplined,”
II Samuel “II Samuel 12:17 (YLT) — And the elders of his house rise against him, to raise him up from the earth, and he hath not been willing, nor hath he eaten with them bread;”
Deuteronomy “Deuteronomy 21:20 (BSB) — and say to the elders, “This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious; he does not obey us. He is a glutton and a drunkard.””
Schaff ANF/NPNF (Patristic) “NPNF1 Vol 3: Augustine — On the Holy Trinity — ON THE GOOD OF MARRIAGE. (part 19): living here, but from duty of being useful(2), takes food that he may remain in the flesh, which is necessary for the sake of others; so to have intercourse with females in right of marriage, was to holy men at that time a matter of duty not of lust. 18. For what food is unto the conservation of the man, this sexual intercourse is unto the conservation of the race: and both are not without carnal delight: which yet being modified, and by restraint of temperance reduced unto the use after nature, cannot be lust.(”
Babylonian Talmud (Jewish (Rabbinic)) “Babylonian Talmud, Bava Metzia 12b.2: The Gemara comments: And Shmuel, in his above explanation of the mishna, disagrees with the opinion of Rabbi Ḥiyya bar Abba. As Rabbi Ḥiyya bar Abba says that Rabbi Yoḥanan says: The word adult in the mishna is not referring to an actual adult, and the word minor is not referring to an actual minor. Rather, with regard to an adult son who is dependent on the food of his father’s table for support, this is considered a minor in the context of the mishna. It is appropriate for one who is reliant on his father’s support to give items that he finds to his fath”
Babylonian Talmud (Jewish (Rabbinic)) “Babylonian Talmud, Sanhedrin 68b.1: MISHNA: The Torah describes the punishment given to a son who steals money from his parents to eat a gluttonous meal of meat and wine in the company of lowly men. If his parents bring him to court for this act, he is exhorted to desist and is punished with lashes. If he repeats the same misdeed and is again brought to court by his parents within the same three-month period, he is considered a stubborn and rebellious son [ ben sorer umoreh ]. He is liable to receive the death penalty, which in this case is execution by stoning. From when does a stubborn and r”
Schaff ANF/NPNF (Patristic) “ANF Vol 8: Twelve Patriarchs, Excerpts, Epistles, Apocrypha, Decretals — CHAP. IV.--THE MOTHER MUST NOT TAKE FOOD WITH HER SON. THE REASON STATED.: As soon as my mother had enough of sleep, she awoke, and Peter at once began first to talk to her of true piety, saying: "I wish you to know, O woman, the course of life involved in our religion.(6) We worship one God, who made the world which you see; and we keep His law, which has for its chief injunctions to worship Him alone, and to hallow His name, and to honour our parents, and to be chaste, and to live piously. In addition to this, we do not”
2 Samuel (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on 2 Samuel 14:21: 14:21 bring back . . . Absalom: It seems that David was not yet interested in full reconciliation with his son (14:24).”
Luke (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on Luke 15:30: 15:30 this son of yours: He refused to acknowledge his own relationship to his brother.”
Mishnah (Jewish (Rabbinic)) “Mishnah, Mishnah Bava Metzia 7:6: A man can stipulate on his own behalf that he receive a certain increase in his wages instead of eating the produce with which he works, and similarly, he can stipulate this on behalf of his adult son or daughter, on behalf of his adult Canaanite slave or Canaanite maidservant, or on behalf of his wife, with their agreement, because they have the basic level of mental competence, i.e., they are legally competent and can therefore waive their rights. But he cannot stipulate this on behalf of his minor son or daughter, nor on behalf of his minor Canaanite slave ”
Mishnah (Jewish (Rabbinic)) “Mishnah, Mishnah Sanhedrin 8:3: If he stole that which belonged to his father and ate on his father’s property, or he stole that which belonged to others and ate on the property of others, or he stole that which belonged to others and ate on his father’s property, he does not become a stubborn and rebellious son, unless he steals that which belonged to his father and eats on the property of others. Rabbi Yosei, son of Rabbi Yehuda, says: He does not become a stubborn and rebellious son unless he steals that which belonged to his father and that which belonged to his mother.”
Babylonian Talmud (Jewish (Rabbinic)) “Babylonian Talmud, Sanhedrin 71a.4: MISHNA: If he stole that which belonged to his father and ate on his father’s property, or he stole that which belonged to others and ate on the property of others, or he stole that which belonged to others and ate on his father’s property, he does not become a stubborn and rebellious son, unless he steals that which belonged to his father and eats on the property of others. Rabbi Yosei, son of Rabbi Yehuda, says: He does not become a stubborn and rebellious son unless he steals that which belonged to his father and that which belonged to his mother.”
Babylonian Talmud (Jewish (Rabbinic)) “Babylonian Talmud, Bava Batra 139a.3: MISHNA: If a person died and left adult and minor sons, the adults are not provided for by using funds of the minors, and the minors are not sustained, i.e., they do not receive food, by using funds of the adults. Rather, they receive a share of the inheritance equally, and each son sees to his needs from his own share.”
Mishnah (Jewish (Rabbinic)) “Mishnah, Mishnah Sanhedrin 8:2: From when is a stubborn and rebellious son liable? From when he eats a tarteimar of meat and drinks a half- log of Italian wine. Rabbi Yosei says: From when he eats a maneh of meat and drinks a log of wine. The mishna now lists a series of conditions concerning his eating and drinking. If he ate these items with a group assembled for the performance of a mitzva, or he ate them at a meal celebrating the intercalation of a month, or he ate the items when they had second tithe status, in Jerusalem, he does not become a stubborn and rebellious son because each of th”

Ask Your Own Question