Befriending Unbelievers in a Christian's Life and Witness
While Christians are called to be distinct from unbelievers, the Bible also encourages interaction and witness to those outside the faith. The Apostle Paul, for instance, identifies himself as "a teacher of the Gentiles in faith and verity" [2]. This mission implies engagement with unbelievers rather than complete separation.
One perspective on this interaction comes from John Calvin, who, commenting on Colossians 4:5, advises believers to "walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time" and to let their "speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt" [7]. This suggests a thoughtful and winsome approach in communication with non-Christians. Similarly, the Apostle Peter exhorts believers to have "your conversation honest among the Gentiles," so that their good works might lead unbelievers to "glorify God in the day of visitation" [3, 4]. This highlights the importance of exemplary conduct as a form of witness.
However, the New Testament also contains warnings about certain types of association. Paul asks, "what concord hath Christ with Beliar? Or what part hath a believer with an unbeliever?" [1]. This verse, particularly in 2 Corinthians 6:14, has been interpreted by some as a prohibition against being "unequally yoked together with unbelievers" [9]. John Gill clarifies that this is not a blanket prohibition against all civil society and converse with unbelievers, as that would be impractical and prevent opportunities for spiritual service [9]. Matthew Henry also notes that the apostle "cautions them against mingling with unbelievers" in a way that would compromise their faith [8].
Thomas Aquinas addresses the question of communicating with unbelievers by distinguishing between two reasons for forbidding such communication: as a punishment for the unbeliever, or for the safety of the believer [6]. He references 1 Corinthians 5:6, where Paul discusses excommunication, to support these motives [6]. The Epistle to the Hebrews also encourages gentleness towards "those who are ignorant and led astray" [5]. Augustine, reflecting on Psalm 55, describes Christ "stretching forth His hands to a people unbelieving and contradicting," yet still saying, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do" [10]. This illustrates a divine example of patience and outreach towards those in unbelief.
Sources
- II Corinthians “II Corinthians 6:15 (Rotherham) — And what concord hath Christ with Beliar? Or what part hath a believer with an unbeliever?”
- I Timothy “I Timothy 2:7 (Webster) — For which I am ordained a preacher and an apostle, (I speak the truth in Christ, [and] lie not) a teacher of the Gentiles in faith and verity.”
- I Peter “I Peter 2:12 (Darby) — having your conversation honest among the Gentiles, that [as to that] in which they speak against you as evildoers, they may through [your] good works, [themselves] witnessing [them], glorifyGod in [the] day of visitation.”
- King James Version “[KJV] 1 Peter 2:12 — Having your conversation honest among the Gentiles: that, whereas they speak against you as evildoers, they may by your good works, which they shall behold, glorify God in the day of visitation.”
- Hebrews “Hebrews 5:2 (LEB) — being able to deal gently with those who are ignorant and led astray, since he himself also is surrounded by weakness,”
- theology (Catholic (Scholastic)) “Aquinas, Summa Theologica, Second Part of the Second Part (Secunda Secundae), Of Unbelief in General, Art. 9: Article: Whether it is lawful to communicate with unbelievers? I answer that, Communication with a particular person is forbidden to the faithful, in two ways: first, as a punishment of the person with whom they are forbidden to communicate; secondly, for the safety of those who are forbidden to communicate with others. Both motives can be gathered from the Apostle's words (1 Cor. 5:6). For after he had pronounced sentence of excommunication, he adds as his reason: "Know you not that a”
- CCEL (Reformed) “Calvin, Commentary on Philippians, Colossians, 1-2 Thessalonians, section 42.1: Colossians 4:5-9 5. Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time. 5. Sapienter ambulate erga extraneos, tempus redimentes. 6. Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man. 6. Sermo vester semper in gratia sit sale conditus: ut sciatis quomodo oporteat vos unicuique respondere. 7. All my state shall Tychicus declare unto you, who is a beloved brother, and a faithful minister and fellowservant in the Lord: 7. Res meas omnes patefaciet vo”
- 2 Corinthians (Nonconformist/Puritan) “Matthew Henry on 2 Corinthians 6:11: The apostle proceeds to address himself more particularly to the Corinthians, and cautions them against mingling with unbelievers. Here observe, I. How the caution is introduced with a profession, in a very pathetic manner, of the most tender affection to them, even like that of a father to his children, Co2 6:11-13. Though the apostle was happy in a great fluency of expressions, yet he seemed to want words to express the warm affections he had for these Corinthians. As if he had said, "O ye Corinthians, to whom I am now writing, I would fain convince you h”
- 2 Corinthians (Baptist/Reformed) “John Gill on 2 Corinthians 6:13: Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers,.... This seems to be an allusion to the law in Deu 22:10 and to be a mystical explanation of it; and is to be understood not as forbidding civil society and converse with unbelievers; for this is impracticable, then must believers needs go out of the world; this the many natural and civil relations subsisting among men make absolutely necessary; and in many cases is both lawful and laudable, especially when there is any opportunity or likelihood of doing them any service in a spiritual way: not is it to be un”
- Schaff ANF/NPNF (Patristic) “NPNF1 Vol 8: Augustine — Exposition on Psalms — PSALM LV.[5] (part 11): Cross."[5] He was stretching forth His hands to a people unbelieving and contradicting. For if just he is that of faith liveth,[6] unjust he is that hath not faith. By that which here he saith "iniquity," I understand unbelief. The Lord therefore was seeing in the city iniquity and contradiction, and was stretching forth His hands to a people unbelieving and contradicting: and nevertheless waiting for these same, He was saying, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do."[7] Even now indeed there rage the remnan”