Biblical Expectations Of Children's Behavior
Scripture presents children as both recipients of divine blessing and subjects of parental authority, with clear behavioral expectations rooted in covenant obedience. The biblical witness consistently calls children to honor, obey, and fear their parents as part of their broader duty to God.
Foundational Commands
The Decalogue establishes the baseline: "Honour thy father and thy mother" (Exodus 20:12), a command that carries explicit promise of blessing [1, 5]. This honor extends beyond mere compliance to encompass reverence—children are instructed to "fear parents" (Leviticus 19:3) and "obey parents" (Proverbs 6:20) [1]. The expectation is comprehensive: children should "attend to parental teaching" (Proverbs 1:8-9) and be "judiciously trained" (Proverbs 22:15; 29:17; Ephesians 6:4) [1]. Charles Hodge notes that this scriptural rule is "simple and comprehensive," prescribing "the general rule of obedience" without unnecessary detail [5].
The Nature of Childhood
Biblical anthropology recognizes that "foolish ways are deep-seated in the heart of a child" (Proverbs 22:15) [4], requiring corrective discipline. Yet children are also "capable of glorifying God" (Psalm 8:2; 148:12-13; Matthew 21:15-16) and should be "brought early to the house of God" (1 Samuel 1:24) [1]. The term "child" itself has considerable latitude in Scripture—Joseph is called a child at approximately sixteen, Benjamin above thirty, and Solomon at his accession (Genesis 37:3; 44:20; 1 Kings 3:7) [2].
Positive Models
Scripture commends "good children" who "know the Scriptures" (2 Timothy 3:15), "observe the law of God" (Proverbs 28:7), and demonstrate obedience that is "well pleasing to God" (Colossians 3:20) [3]. Such children "make their parents' hearts glad" (Proverbs 10:1; 29:17) and "show love to parents" through practical care (Genesis 46:29; 45:9-11; 47:12) [3]. Christ himself exemplified childhood obedience (Luke 2:51; John 19:26-27) [1].
The expectation extends beyond the household: children should "fear God" (Proverbs 24:21), "remember God" (Ecclesiastes 12:1), and "honour the aged" (Job 32:6-7) [1, 3]. John Gill observes that Christ's welcome of children teaches disciples "to regard the weakest believers, and such as were but children in knowledge" [6], suggesting that childlike humility remains the posture of all who "expect the kingdom of heaven."
Sources
- Torrey's Topical Textbook “Torrey's Topical Textbook: Children — Christ was an example to -- Lu 2:51; Joh 19:26,27. Are a gift from God -- Ge 33:5; Ps 127:3. Are capable of glorifying God -- Ps 8:2; 148:12,13; Mt 21:15,16. Should be Brought to Christ. -- Mr 10:13-16. Brought early to the house of God. -- 1Sa 1:24. Instructed in the ways of God. -- De 31:12,13; Pr 22:6. Judiciously trained. -- Pr 22:15; 29:17; Eph 6:4. Should Obey God. -- De 30:2. Fear God. -- Pr 24:21. Remember God. -- Ec 12:1. Attend to parental teaching. -- Pr 1:8,9. Honour parents. -- Ex 20:12; Heb 12:9. Fear parents. -- Le 19:3. Obey parents. -- Pr ”
- Easton's Bible Dictionary “Easton's Bible Dictionary: Child — This word has considerable latitude of meaning in Scripture. Thus Joseph is called a child at the time when he was probably about sixteen years of age (Gen. 37:3); and Benjamin is so called when he was above thirty years (44:20). Solomon called himself a little child when he came to the kingdom (1 Kings 3:7). The descendants of a man, however remote, are called his children; as, "the children of Edom," "the children of Moab," "the children of Israel." In the earliest times mothers did not wean their children till they were from thirty months to three years ol”
- Torrey's Topical Textbook “Torrey's Topical Textbook: Children, Good — The Lord is with -- 1Sa 3:19. Know the Scriptures -- 2Ti 3:15. Observe the law of God -- Pr 28:7. Their obedience to parents is well pleasing to God -- Col 3:20. Partake of the promises of God -- Ac 2:39. Shall be blessed -- Pr 3:1-4; Eph 6:2,3. Show love to parents -- Ge 46:29. Obey parents -- Ge 28:7; 47:30. Attend to parental teaching -- Pr 13:1. Take care of parents -- Ge 45:9,11; 47:12. Make their parents' hearts glad -- Pr 10:1; 29:17. Honour the aged -- Job 32:6,7. Adduced as a motive for submission to God -- Heb 12:9. Spirit of, a requisite f”
- Proverbs “Proverbs 22:15 (BBE) — Foolish ways are deep-seated in the heart of a child, but the rod of punishment will send them far from him.”
- CCEL (Reformed (Old Princeton)) “Charles Hodge, Systematic Theology, Vol. 3, section 47: 352 The Scriptural rule is simple and comprehensive. It does not go into unnecessary details. It prescribes the general rule of obedience. The exceptions to that rule must be such as justify themselves to a divinely enlightened conscience, i.e ., a conscience enlightened by the Word and Spirit of God. The general principle given in the Bible in all such cases is, “It is right to obey God rather than man.” The Promise. This commandment has a special promise attached to it. This promise has a theocratical form as it stands in the decalogue,”
- Matthew (Baptist/Reformed) “John Gill on Matthew 19:14: But Jesus said, suffer little children.... This he said to show his humility, that he was not above taking notice of any; and to teach his disciples to regard the weakest believers, and such as were but children in knowledge; and to inform them what all ought to be, who expect the kingdom of heaven; for it follows; and forbid them not to come unto me, now, or at any other time; for of such is the kingdom of heaven; that is, as the Syriac renders it, "who are as these" or as the Persic version, rather paraphrasing than translating, renders it, "who have been humb”