Courtship Duration and Purity in Christian Relationships
Courtship Duration and Purity in Christian Relationships
The concept of purity in Christian relationships is deeply rooted in biblical teachings and has been a subject of discussion across various Christian traditions. The Bible emphasizes the importance of purity in relationships, particularly in the context of marriage. In Hosea 2:19, God is depicted as taking Israel as His bride "in righteousness and in right judging, in love and in mercies" [1]. This metaphorical representation underscores the significance of purity and righteousness in marital relationships.
In the New Testament, the Apostle Paul highlights the importance of purity in Christian living, listing it among the virtues that believers should cultivate (2 Corinthians 6:6) [2]. The pursuit of purity is not limited to individual conduct but extends to relationships, including those between engaged couples.
The duration of courtship and the maintenance of purity during this period have been subjects of varying interpretations across Christian traditions. The Reformed tradition, as represented by John Calvin, emphasizes the importance of chastity and purity in all relationships, including marriage. Calvin suggests that individuals should measure their ability to remain chaste and consider marriage if they cannot remain celibate [3].
In contrast, the Catholic tradition, as articulated by Thomas Aquinas, views purity as an essential virtue that is closely tied to chastity. Aquinas argues that purity is particularly relevant to matters related to sexual conduct, of which individuals are most ashamed [6].
The Jewish (Rabbinic) tradition, as reflected in the Babylonian Talmud, discusses the concept of purity in the context of marital relations and ritual purity. The Talmud notes that the Sages extended the period of purity in certain cases to a night and a half a day due to the variability in the timing of marriage contracts and their consummation [4, 5].
While there is no uniform Christian doctrine on the ideal duration of courtship, various traditions emphasize the importance of maintaining purity during this period. The Patristic tradition, represented by Augustine, underscores the value of mutual vows of continence within marriage and views the nuptial bond as being strengthened by such vows [7].
Sources
- Hosea “Hosea 2:19 (BBE) — And I will take you as my bride for ever; truly, I will take you as my bride in righteousness and in right judging, in love and in mercies.”
- 2 Corinthians “2 Corinthians 6:6 (NASB) — in purity, in knowledge, in patience, in kindness, in the Holy Spirit, in genuine love,”
- CCEL (Reformed) “John Calvin, Institutes of the Christian Religion, section 44: encumbered in his service, do we not oppose God, and nature as constituted by him, if we do not accommodate our mode of life to the measure of our ability? The Lord prohibits fornication, therefore he requires purity and chastity. The only method which each has of preserving it is to measure himself by his capacity. Let no man rashly despise matrimony as a thing useless or superfluous to him; let no man long for celibacy unless he is able to dispense with the married state. Nor even here let him consult the tranquillity or convenie”
- Babylonian Talmud (Jewish (Rabbinic)) “Babylonian Talmud, Niddah 146a.130:8: And if you wish, say instead: With regard to the purity of wine, a period is twelve hours. But in the case of marriage the time frame is different, due to the marriage contract, which is signed before the marriage is consummated, as there are those who delay for a lengthy period until they complete and sign it. Consequently, the Sages extended the period in this case to a night and half a day.”
- Babylonian Talmud (Jewish (Rabbinic)) “Babylonian Talmud, Niddah 65b.8: And if you wish, say instead: With regard to the purity of wine, a period is twelve hours. But in the case of marriage the time frame is different, due to the marriage contract, which is signed before the marriage is consummated, as there are those who delay for a lengthy period until they complete and sign it. Consequently, the Sages extended the period in this case to a night and half a day.”
- theology (Catholic (Scholastic)) “Aquinas, Summa Theologica, Second Part of the Second Part (Secunda Secundae), Of Chastity, Art. 4: Article: Whether purity belongs especially to chastity? I answer that, As stated above (Objection [2]), "pudicitia" [purity] takes its name from "pudor," which signifies shame. Hence purity must needs be properly about the things of which man is most ashamed. Now men are most ashamed of venereal acts, as Augustine remarks (De Civ. Dei xiv, 18), so much so that even the conjugal act, which is adorned by the honesty [*Cf. Question [145]] of marriage, is not devoid of shame: and this because the mov”
- Schaff ANF/NPNF (Patristic) “NPNF1 Vol 5: Augustine — Anti-Pelagian — CHAP. 12 [XI.]--MARRIAGE DOES NOT CANCEL A MUTUAL VOW OF CONTINENCE; THERE WAS TRUE WEDLOCK BETWEEN MARY AND JOSEPH; IN WHAT WAY JOSEPH WAS THE FATHER OF CHRIST. (part 1): But God forbid that the nuptial bond should be regarded as broken between those who have by mutual consent agreed to observe a perpetual abstinence from the use of carnal concupiscence. Nay, it will be only a firmer one, whereby they have exchanged pledges together, which will have to be kept by an especial endearment and concord,--not by the voluptuous links of bodies, but by the vol”