Cultivating Gratitude and Appreciation in Marriage Despite Challenges
Cultivating Gratitude in Marriage
The biblical foundation for cultivating gratitude and appreciation in marriage is rooted in the mutual respect and love that spouses are called to demonstrate towards one another. In Ephesians 5:28-29, husbands are instructed to "prize and cherish their wives, for in marriage the two have become one" [6]. This unity is not limited to the emotional or physical aspects of marriage but also encompasses a spiritual dimension, as spouses are described as "co-heirs of the grace of life" in 1 Peter 3:7 [1, 2].
Practicing gratitude in marriage involves recognizing the value and contributions of one's spouse. According to Matthew Henry, a good spouse is considered a "great blessing" and a "jewel of great value" [8]. This appreciation can be fostered through prayer, as Adam Clarke notes that "without this, neither wives, husbands, children, parents, servants, nor masters, could fulfill the duties which God, in their respective stations, required of them" [3]. By praying for one another and for the grace to fulfill their respective roles, spouses can cultivate a deeper sense of gratitude and appreciation.
The biblical emphasis on mutual respect and love is also reflected in the instruction to "love their husbands" and "help and assist them all they can" (Titus 2:3-4) [4]. This mutual support and care can help to foster a sense of gratitude and appreciation in marriage, even in the face of challenges. As Tyndale House notes, "Christian marriages should be marked by love and respect" [5].
In times of difficulty, spouses can draw on the biblical instruction to "continue in prayer" and to "grow in grace" (Colossians 4:2, 2 Peter 3:18) [3, 7]. By doing so, they can cultivate a deeper sense of gratitude and appreciation for one another, and for the blessings they have received. As John Gill notes, growing in grace involves "using the gifts of grace" and "being thankful for them" [7].
The practice of gratitude in marriage is not limited to the relationship between spouses but also involves recognizing the role of God in their union. According to Matthew Henry, a good spouse is a blessing from God, and spouses should acknowledge this in their prayers and actions [8]. By doing so, they can cultivate a deeper sense of gratitude and appreciation for one another, and for the gift of marriage itself.
Sources
- I Peter “I Peter 3:7 (LITV) — Likewise, husbands, dwelling together according to knowledge, as with a weaker vessel, the female, bestowing honor, as truly being co-heirs of the grace of life, not cutting off your prayers.”
- King James Version “[KJV] 1 Peter 3:7 — Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.”
- Colossians (Methodist/Wesleyan) “Adam Clarke on Colossians 4:2: Continue in prayer - This was the apostle's general advice to all; without this, neither wives, husbands, children, parents, servants, nor masters, could fulfill the duties which God, in their respective stations, required of them. All might, power, and life come from God; his creatures are continually dependent upon him for all these: to earnest, persevering prayer, he has promised every supply; but he who prays not has no promise. How few wives feel it their duty to pray to God to give them grace to behave as wives! How few husbands pray for the grace suited to”
- Titus (Baptist/Reformed) “John Gill on Titus 2:3: That they may teach the young women to be sober,.... Or to be chaste, modest, and temperate; or to be wise and prudent in their conduct to their husbands, and in the management of family affairs, who have had a large experience of these things before them. To love their husbands; to help and assist them all they can; to seek their honour and interest; to endeavour to please them in all things; to secure peace, harmony, and union; to carry it affectionately to them, and sympathize with them in all afflictions and distresses; for this is not so much said in opposition t”
- Ephesians (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on Ephesians 5:33: 5:33 Paul summarizes his teaching on the relationship between husbands and wives (5:22-33). Christian marriages should be marked by love and respect.”
- Ephesians (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on Ephesians 5:28: 5:28-29 Husbands should prize and cherish their wives, for in marriage the two have become one (see 5:31).”
- 2 Peter (Baptist/Reformed) “John Gill on 2 Peter 3:18: But grow in grace,.... In the gifts of grace, which, under a divine blessing, may be increased by using them: gifts neglected decrease, but stirred up and used, are improved and increase. And though men are to be thankful for their gifts, and be contented with them, yet they may lawfully desire more, and in the use of means seek an increase of them, which may be a means of preserving themselves, and others, from the error of the wicked. Moreover, by "grace" may be meant internal grace. The work of grace is gradual; it is like a grain of mustard seed, or like seed cas”
- Proverbs (Nonconformist/Puritan) “Matthew Henry on Proverbs 18:22: Note, 1. A good wife is a great blessing to a man. He that finds a wife (that is, a wife indeed; a bad wife does not deserve to be called by a name of so much honour), that finds a help meet for him (that is a wife in the original acceptation of the word), that sought such a one with care and prayer and has found what he sought, he has found a good thing, a jewel of great value, a rare jewel; he has found that which will not only contribute more than any thing to his comfort in this life, but will forward him in the way to heaven. 2. God is to be acknowledged i”