God's Design for Complementarity in Christian Marriage
God's design for Christian marriage is rooted in the creation account, where humanity is made in God's image as male and female [2]. This institution, established at the time of humanity's original creation, is intended for the happiness of mankind, to increase the human population, and to raise godly offspring [1, 5]. Marriage is described as a covenant relationship [1] and is to be held in honor by all [4].
The concept of complementarity in marriage stems from God's observation that "it is not good that the man should be alone" (Genesis 2:18) [8]. God then created a "helper fit for him" [8]. This helper, the woman, was formed from the man, signifying their unity and mutual dependence [5]. John Chrysostom notes that God made them to dwell together, recognizing the great advantage of this companionship [13]. He also highlights that while God bade the man govern and the woman obey, He honored the woman by making them one, implying she was made for his need and drawing him to her [10].
The biblical narrative emphasizes the unity of man and wife, with the woman being formed out of the man [5]. This unity is expressed in the statement that "a man leaves father and mother and is joined to his wife" [6]. This joining together signifies a profound bond [1]. The apostle Paul further emphasizes this unity, stating that "neither sex is insulated and independent of the other in the Christian life" and that "the one needs the other in the sexual relation" [9]. Love is presented as the "bond of perfectness" that should be added above all else in this relationship [3].
Beyond companionship, marriage serves several divine purposes. It is a means for procreation, with God blessing the first humans to "be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth" [7, 1]. Calvin notes that this command signifies that Adam and Eve were formed for the production of offspring to populate the earth, and that this shared origin fosters mutual concord among humanity [14]. Marriage also serves to prevent fornication [1]. The Bible frequently uses marriage as a symbol for the covenant relationship between God and His people, with adultery symbolizing spiritual unfaithfulness [11, 12].
Sources
- Torrey's Topical Textbook “Torrey's Topical Textbook: Marriage — Divinely instituted -- Ge 2:24. A covenant relationship -- Mal 2:4. Designed for The happiness of man. -- Ge 2:18. Increasing the human population. -- Ge 1:28; 9:1. Raising up godly seed. -- Mal 2:15. Preventing fornication. -- 1Co 7:2. The expectation of the promised seed of the woman an incentive to, in the early age -- Ge 3:15; 4:1. Lawful in all -- 1Co 7:2,28; 1Ti 5:14. Honourable for all -- Heb 13:4. Should be only in the Lord -- 1Co 7:39. Expressed by Joining together. -- Mt 19:6. Making affinity. -- 1Ki 3:1. Taking to wife. -- Ex 2:1. Giving daughte”
- Genesis “Genesis 1:27 (YLT) — And God prepareth the man in His image; in the image of God He prepared him, a male and a female He prepared them.”
- Colossians “Colossians 3:14 (LITV) — And above all these, add love, which is the bond of perfectness.”
- Hebrews “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the bed be undefiled: but God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterers. -- Hebrews 13:4”
- Smith's Bible Dictionary “Smith's Bible Dictionary: Marriage — + Its origin and history .--The institution of marriage dates from the time of man's original creation. (Genesis 2:18-25) From (Genesis 2:24) we may evolve the following principles: (1) The unity of man and wife, as implied in her being formed out of man. (2) The indissolubleness of the marriage bond, except on; the strongest grounds, Comp. (Matthew 19:9) (3) Monogamy, as the original law of marriage (4) The social equality of man and wife. (5) The subordination of the wife to the husband. (1 Corinthians 11:8,9; 1 Timothy 2:13) (6) The respective duties of ”
- Ephesians (Presbyterian) “Jamieson, Fausset & Brown on Ephesians 5:31: For--The propagation of the Church from Christ, as that of Eve from Adam, is the foundation of the spiritual marriage. The natural marriage, wherein "a man leaves father and mother (the oldest manuscripts omit 'his') and is joined unto his wife," is not the principal thing meant here, but the spiritual marriage represented by it, and on which it rests, whereby Christ left the Father's bosom to woo to Himself the Church out of a lost world: Eph 5:32 proves this: His earthly mother as such, also, He holds in secondary account as compared with His spir”
- Genesis (Baptist/Reformed) “John Gill on Genesis 1:28: And God blessed them,.... The man and the woman he had made, with all the blessings of nature and Providence; with all the good things of life; with his presence, and with communion with himself in a natural way, through the creatures; and particularly with a power of procreating their species, as follows, and God said unto them, be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth: if this is not an express command, as the Jews understand it, for marriage and procreation of children, it seems to be more than a bare permission; at least it is a direction and an advic”
- Genesis (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on Genesis 2:18: 2:18-23 As human creation was the climax of ch 1, so human intimacy is the high point of ch 2. God’s concern for mutual human support and companionship finds no parallel in ancient Near Eastern literature. 2:18 It is not good: This is God’s first negative assessment of an otherwise excellent creation (1:31). The Lord God is portrayed as a father who obtains a bride for his son (cp. ch 24). • The answer to the man’s need is a helper who is just right for him; she is his perfect complement, made in the same image of God (1:26-27), given the same commission (1:28; 2”
- 1 Corinthians (Presbyterian) “Jamieson, Fausset & Brown on 1 Corinthians 11:11: Yet neither sex is insulated and independent of the other in the Christian life [ALFORD]. The one needs the other in the sexual relation; and in respect to Christ ("in the Lord"), the man and the woman together (for neither can be dispensed with) realize the ideal of redeemed humanity represented by the bride, the Church.”
- CCEL/NPNF (Eastern Orthodox) “John Chrysostom, Homilies on 1 & 2 Corinthians: the first two only were in being, He bade him govern, and her obey. And in order again that He might not despise her as inferior, and separate from her, see how He honored her, and made them one, even before her creation. For, “Let us make for man,” saith He, “a help meet,” implying that she was made for his need, and thereby drawing him unto her who was made for his sake: since to all those things are we more kindly disposed, which are done for our sakes. But that she, on the other hand, might not be elated, as being granted him for help, nor mi”
- Ezek (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on Ezek 23:4: 23:4 Marriage is commonly used in the Bible as a symbol for the covenant relationship between God and his people (e.g., Isa 54:1-8; Eph 5:22-33). Adultery symbolizes Israel’s spiritual unfaithfulness (e.g., Hos 1–3). God makes his covenants in spite of, not because of, his people’s character (Rom 5:6-11).”
- Ezekiel (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on Ezekiel 23:4: 23:4 Marriage is commonly used in the Bible as a symbol for the covenant relationship between God and his people (e.g., Isa 54:1-8; Eph 5:22-33). Adultery symbolizes Israel’s spiritual unfaithfulness (e.g., Hos 1–3). God makes his covenants in spite of, not because of, his people’s character (Rom 5:6-11).”
- CCEL/NPNF (Eastern Orthodox) “John Chrysostom, Homilies on John & Hebrews: 66 Homily XIX. John i. 41, 42 “He first findeth his own brother Simon, and saith unto him, We have found the Messias, which is, being interpreted, the Christ. And he brought him to Jesus.” [1.] When God in the beginning made man, He did not suffer him to be alone, but gave him woman for a helpmate, and made them to dwell together, knowing that great advantage would result from this companionship. What though the woman did not rightly employ this benefit? still if any one make himself fully acquainted with the nature of the matter, he will see, that ”
- CCEL (Reformed) “Calvin, Commentary on Genesis, Vol. 1 (Gen 1-23), section 5.35: of offspring, as God imparts his power to some and withholds it from others. But here Moses would simply declare that Adam with his wife was formed for the production of offspring, in order that men might replenish the earth. God could himself indeed have covered the earth with a multitude of men; but it was his will that we should proceed from one fountain, in order that our desire of mutual concord might be the greater, and that each might the more freely embrace the other as his own flesh. Besides, as men were created to occupy”