Honesty and Bluntness in Speech and Communication
Honesty in speech is presented in biblical texts as an outflow of a person's character, deeply connected to inner conviction and sincerity [1, 3]. The book of Proverbs emphasizes that both honest speech and lies originate from within an individual's core being [1]. This internal disposition is crucial, as Job 33:3 suggests that speaking "purely" or "sincerely" means not distorting the truth through passion, in contrast to those who might do so [3].
The concept of sincerity extends to one's conduct, as seen in 2 Corinthians 1:12, where Paul speaks of his "godly sincerity" (literally, "sincerity of God"), implying a sincerity lived as if in God's presence [8]. This suggests that honest communication is not merely about conveying facts but doing so with an integrity that reflects one's spiritual state.
While honesty is valued, biblical wisdom also cautions against bluntness or hasty speech that lacks wisdom and patience. Proverbs 18:13 warns that hasty speech can indicate self-conceit and lead to shame [4]. Similarly, Proverbs 14:29 connects being "slow to anger" with wisdom, suggesting that a mild and patient person is intelligent, understanding human nature and knowing how to moderate resentments [6]. This perspective implies that wisdom involves not just speaking truthfully, but also discerning the appropriate timing and manner of communication.
Matthew Henry, commenting on Proverbs 25:15, recommends patience and mildness in interactions, particularly when trying to persuade others [7]. one tradition argues that patience allows for "a fit opportunity to offer our reasons" and gives people time to consider them, even when faced with initial resistance [7]. This approach suggests that effective communication, even when conveying truth, benefits from a gentle and measured delivery rather than an abrupt or forceful one [7]. The "sweetness of the lips" is described in Proverbs 16:21 as eloquent discourse that persuades and instructs, indicating that the manner of speaking contributes to its effectiveness [5].
The New Testament also illustrates the nature of earnest discussion. Luke 24:17 describes the disciples' "communications" as implying an "earnest discussion" that was evident in their demeanor [2]. This suggests that genuine communication can involve deep engagement and conviction, but the broader biblical emphasis on wisdom, patience, and sincerity indicates that such earnestness should be tempered with thoughtful consideration and a gentle spirit [3, 6, 7]. The goal is not merely to speak what is true, but to do so in a way that is pure, wise, and conducive to persuasion and instruction [3, 5].
Sources
- Proverbs (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on Proverbs 14:5: 14:5 Honest speech and lies both flow from deep within a person’s character. Cp. 12:17.”
- Luke (Presbyterian) “Jamieson, Fausset & Brown on Luke 24:17: communications, &c.--The words imply the earnest discussion that had appeared in their manner.”
- Job (Presbyterian) “Jamieson, Fausset & Brown on Job 33:3: I will speak according to my inward conviction. clearly--rather, "purely"; sincerely, not distorting the truth through passion, as the friends did.”
- Proverbs (Presbyterian) “Jamieson, Fausset & Brown on Proverbs 18:13: Hasty speech evinces self-conceit, and ensures shame (Pro 26:12).”
- Proverbs (Presbyterian) “Jamieson, Fausset & Brown on Proverbs 16:21: wise in heart--who rightly consider duty. sweetness of the lips--eloquent discourse, persuades and instructs others.”
- Proverbs (Nonconformist/Puritan) “Matthew Henry on Proverbs 14:29: Note, 1. Meekness is wisdom. He rightly understands himself, and his duty and interest, the infirmities of human nature, and the constitution of human society, who is slow to anger, and knows how to excuse the faults of others as well as his own, how to adjourn his resentments, and moderate them, so as by no provocation to be put out of the possession of his own soul. A mild patient man is really to be accounted an intelligent man, one that learns of Christ, who is Wisdom itself. 2. Unbridled passion is folly proclaimed: He that is hasty of spirit, whose heart ”
- Proverbs (Nonconformist/Puritan) “Matthew Henry on Proverbs 25:15: Two things are here recommended to us, in dealing with others, as likely means to gain our point: - 1. Patience, to bear a present heat without being put into a heat by it, and to wait for a fit opportunity to offer our reasons and to give persons time to consider them. By this means even a prince may be persuaded to do a thing which he seemed very averse to, much more a common person. That which is justice and reason now will be so another time, and therefore we need not urge them with violence now, but wait for a more convenient season. 2. Mildness, to speak ”
- 2 Corinthians (Presbyterian) “Jamieson, Fausset & Brown on 2 Corinthians 1:12: For--reason why he may confidently look for their prayers for him. our rejoicing--Greek, "our glorying." Not that he glories in the testimony of his conscience, as something to boast of; nay, this testimony is itself the thing in which his glorying consists. in simplicity--Most of the oldest manuscripts read, "in holiness." English Version reading is perhaps a gloss from Eph 6:5 [ALFORD]. Some of the oldest manuscripts and versions, however, support it. godly sincerity--literally, "sincerity of God"; that is, sincerity as in the presence o”