Spiritual Connection and Marriage to an Unbeliever
The New Testament addresses the spiritual connection and marital obligations of a believer married to an unbeliever, particularly in 1 Corinthians 7 and 2 Corinthians 6. Paul's counsel in 1 Corinthians 7:12-13 indicates that he did not have a direct command from Jesus on the matter, but his advice emphasizes faithfulness to the marriage commitment [7].
A key passage is 1 Corinthians 7:14, which states, "For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy" [1, 2]. This "sanctification" is not an internal, saving sanctification of the unbelieving spouse, which can only come through the Spirit of God [8]. Instead, it refers to a form of external or relational holiness. The Christian spouse brings a measure of holiness to the marriage, which extends to the children, who are considered "holy" or set apart by virtue of having a believing parent [6]. This means the children benefit from the Christian parent's faith and are not considered "unclean" [6].
Despite this, Paul strongly discouraged Christians from marrying unbelievers. In 2 Corinthians 6:15, he asks, "What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? Or what does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?" [3, 4]. This passage is often interpreted as a prohibition against believers entering into marriage with non-believers [5]. Paul's concern extended to situations where young widows might remarry unbelievers, potentially leading them away from their Christian faith [9].
If an unbelieving spouse chooses to depart from the marriage due to religious differences, the believing spouse is not bound to maintain the marriage. Paul states, "If the unbeliever breaks up the marriage, the believing husband or wife is free to let them go" [10]. This is because God desires His people to live in peace, rather than in the conflict that can arise from a mixed marriage when the non-Christian spouse no longer desires it [10]. However, the believing spouse should make efforts to retain the unbelieving partner, unless doing so would require them to deny Christ or abandon their faith [11]. Wives are also exhorted to be in subjection to their husbands, even if the husband "obeys not the word," in hopes that their conduct might win over their unbelieving spouse [12].
Sources
- 1 Corinthians “1 Corinthians 7:14 (NASB) — For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; for otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy.”
- I Corinthians “I Corinthians 7:14 (BSB) — For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his believing wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.”
- II Corinthians “II Corinthians 6:15 (BSB) — What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? Or what does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?”
- 2 Corinthians “2 Corinthians 6:15 (NASB) — Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever?”
- 1 Corinthians (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on 1 Corinthians 7:39: 7:39 A widow may marry another man, but only if he loves the Lord. Paul strongly discouraged the marriage of Christians to unbelievers (cp. 2 Cor 6:14-16).”
- 1 Corinthians (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on 1 Corinthians 7:14: 7:14 By remaining committed to the marriage, the Christian brings holiness to the unbelieving spouse. Such holiness extends to the children, who also benefit from the holiness of a Christian parent (cp. Mal 2:15).”
- 1 Corinthians (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on 1 Corinthians 7:12: 7:12-13 Paul now turns to the case of a Christian married to an unbeliever. • I do not have a direct command from the Lord: Paul knew of no saying of Jesus that was directly applicable, but his counsel is consistent: Believers must be faithful and honor their marriage commitment.”
- 1 Corinthians (Baptist/Reformed) “John Gill on 1 Corinthians 7:14: For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife,.... That is, "by the believing wife"; as the Vulgate Latin and Syriac versions read, and so it is read in some copies; and likewise in the next clause the same is read, by the believing husband; this is a reason given by the apostle why they should live together. This cannot be understood of internal sanctification, which is never the case; an unbeliever cannot be sanctified by a believer in this sense, for such a sanctification is only by the Spirit of God; nor external sanctification, or an outward refo”
- 1 Timothy (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on 1 Timothy 5:11: 5:11-15 Young widows still in their childbearing years required a different approach. Paul was concerned that the false teachers were leading them astray. 5:11-12 If Paul was concerned about remarriage to unbelievers (cp. 5:14), their previous pledge would refer to their Christian faith, which they would surrender upon entering a pagan marriage; such a marriage would probably have alienated them from Christ. It is also possible that Paul and the church recognized a special category of “sacred widowhood” (see 5:5; cp. Acts 9:36-37), entered by a vow that Paul re”
- 1 Corinthians (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on 1 Corinthians 7:15: 7:15 If the unbeliever breaks up the marriage, the believing husband or wife is free to let them go. • has called you: God’s desire is that his people live in peace, rather than in the intolerable conflict of a mixed marriage no longer desired by the non-Christian spouse.”
- 1 Corinthians (Baptist/Reformed) “John Gill on 1 Corinthians 7:15: But if the unbelieving depart,.... If the unbelieving party, man or woman, separate themselves from the believing party on account of religion, and in hatred to it, and will not live with the believer unless Christ is denied, his Gospel abjured, and his ordinances and worship relinquished: let him depart; he or she, though not without making use of all proper means to retain them; but if, after all, they will go, unless such things are complied with as are unreasonable and sinful, they are not to be held, but let go; and the deserted person may sit down conte”
- 1 Peter (Baptist/Reformed) “John Gill on 1 Peter 3:1: Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands,.... As well as subjects to princes, and servants to masters; though not with the same sort of subjection, but what is suitable to the relation they stand in to their husbands; See Gill on Eph 5:22. See Gill on Col 3:18. that if any obey not the word; any husband who is an unbeliever, has no love for the Gospel, and gives no credit to it, but despises, disbelieves, and rejects it, the word of truth, of faith, of righteousness, reconciliation, and salvation. The apostle, though he includes all wives, and exhor”