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Mutual Submission in Marriage Relationships and Ephesians 5

Ephesians 5:21–33 presents instructions for Christian households, particularly focusing on the relationship between husbands and wives, framed within a broader call for mutual submission among believers. The passage begins with a general exhortation: "Submitting your selues one to another in the feare of God" (Ephesians 5:21, Geneva1599) [1]. This verse serves as a foundational principle for the subsequent, more specific directives concerning wives and husbands [11].

The literary context of Ephesians 5 is a series of exhortations following theological discussions in the earlier chapters. The apostle Paul transitions from doctrinal teaching to practical application, urging believers to live lives worthy of their calling [8, 12]. Chapter 5 specifically addresses purity of life, warning against uncleanness, and then moves into the duties within marriage [10, 12]. The call to "be ye therefore followers of God, as deare children" (Ephesians 5:1, Geneva1599) sets the tone, emphasizing imitation of God's love and Christ's self-sacrifice [8]. This chapter also contains warnings against various sins such as sexual immorality, impurity, covetousness, and foolish talk, contrasting them with thanksgiving and walking as children of light [4]. The passage on marriage is thus situated within a larger discourse on Christian conduct and spiritual maturity.

The specific instructions for wives begin in Ephesians 5:22: "Wiues, submit your selues vnto your husbands, as vnto the Lord" (Geneva1599) [2]. This submission is further elaborated in Ephesians 5:24, stating, "Therfore as the Church is in subiection to Christ, euen so let the wiues be to their husbands in euery thing" (Geneva1599) [3]. The instruction for husbands follows, commanding them to love their wives "as Christ also loved the Church, and gaue himselfe for it" (Ephesians 5:25, Geneva1599). This love is described as sacrificial, nurturing, and cherishing, akin to how Christ cares for his own body, the Church [5]. The passage concludes by reiterating the profound unity of husband and wife, drawing a parallel to the mystery of Christ and the Church [13].

The phrase "submitting your selues one to another" in Ephesians 5:21 is crucial for understanding the subsequent verses. Matthew Henry notes that this verse lays a general foundation for relative duties, emphasizing a mutual submission among Christians, characterized by condescension and bearing one another's burdens rather than domineering [11]. This mutual submission is rooted in "the feare of God" [1].

When addressing wives, the instruction is to "submit your selues vnto your husbands" [2]. The oldest manuscripts of Ephesians 5:22 omit the explicit phrase "submit yourselves," implying it is to be supplied from the preceding verse, Ephesians 5:21 [9]. This suggests that the submission of wives to husbands is a specific application of the general principle of mutual submission [9]. The nature of this submission is likened to the Church's submission to Christ [3, 7]. Commentators like Jamieson, Fausset & Brown highlight that the Church's relationship to Christ serves as the archetype for the husband-wife relationship [9]. The phrase "your own husbands" (Ephesians 5:22) is presented as an argument for submissiveness, implying that it is not to a stranger but to one's own spouse [9].

For husbands, the command is to "love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church" (Ephesians 5:25, Geneva1599). This love is not merely affection but a self-sacrificial act, as Christ "gave himself for it" [10]. The love of the husband for his wife is further compared to loving his own body: "He that loveth his wife loveth himself" (Ephesians 5:28, Geneva1599) [13]. This comparison underscores the profound unity between husband and wife, where harm to one is harm to the other [13]. The husband is to nourish and cherish his wife, just as Christ nourishes and cherishes the Church [5].

The relationship described in Ephesians 5:22-33 is presented as a reflection of the union between Christ and the Church [7]. This analogy elevates the marriage relationship, giving it a profound spiritual significance. The submission of the wife and the sacrificial love of the husband are not merely social conventions but are meant to embody the divine relationship between Christ and his people [7].

The passage has been interpreted in various ways throughout history. Some interpretations emphasize the hierarchical aspect, where the husband holds a position of headship and the wife is called to obey [9]. The Jamieson, Fausset & Brown commentary, for instance, distinguishes between the "obedience" required of children (Ephesians 6:1) and the "submission" or "being subject" required of wives (Ephesians 5:21), suggesting that obedience is more "unreasoning and implicit," while submission is the "willing subjection of an inferior in point of order to one who has a right to command" [14]. Other interpretations, however, place greater emphasis on the mutual submission of Ephesians 5:21 as the overarching principle, viewing the specific instructions for wives and husbands as complementary roles within that framework of mutual respect and service [11]. The Tyndale House commentary notes that while wives are to submit and show respect, it is "equally important" for husbands to love their wives [7].

The broader context of Ephesians 5 also includes exhortations to walk circumspectly, "redeeming the time," and being "filled with the Spirit" (Ephesians 5:15-18, Geneva1599) [6, 8]. These spiritual disciplines are seen as foundational for living out the specific relational duties outlined in the latter part of the chapter. The call to sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, and to give thanks always for all things (Ephesians 5:19-20), precedes the instructions on submission, suggesting that these practices foster the spiritual environment in which such relational dynamics can flourish. The entire chapter, therefore, presents a holistic vision of Christian life, where personal piety and communal relationships are intertwined.

Sources

  1. Ephesians “Ephesians 5:21 (Geneva1599) — Submitting your selues one to another in the feare of God.”
  2. Ephesians “Ephesians 5:22 (Geneva1599) — Wiues, submit your selues vnto your husbands, as vnto the Lord.”
  3. Ephesians “Ephesians 5:24 (Geneva1599) — Therfore as the Church is in subiection to Christ, euen so let the wiues be to their husbands in euery thing.”
  4. Treasury of Scripture Knowledge “Ephesians 5:5 cross-references: 1 Corinthians 6:9, Galatians 5:19, Galatians 5:21, Ephesians 5:3, Colossians 3:5, 1 Timothy 6:10, 1 Timothy 6:17, Hebrews 13:4, Revelation 21:8, Revelation 22:15”
  5. Treasury of Scripture Knowledge “Ephesians 5:29 cross-references: Proverbs 11:17, Ecclesiastes 4:5, Isaiah 40:11, Ezekiel 34:14, Ezekiel 34:27, Matthew 23:37, John 6:50, Romans 1:31, Ephesians 5:31”
  6. Treasury of Scripture Knowledge “Ephesians 5:15 cross-references: Exodus 23:13, 2 Samuel 24:10, Job 2:10, Psalms 73:22, Proverbs 14:8, Matthew 8:4, Matthew 10:16, Matthew 25:2, Matthew 27:4, Matthew 27:24, Luke 24:25, 1 Corinthians 14:20, Galatians 3:1, Galatians 3:3, Ephesians 5:33, Philippians 1:27, Colossians 1:9, Colossians 4:5, 1 Thessalonians 5:15, 1 Timothy 6:9, Hebrews 12:25, James 3:13, 1 Peter 1:22, Revelation 19:10”
  7. Ephesians (Protestant academic) “Tyndale House on Ephesians 5:22: 5:22-33 Christian wives are to submit to their husbands, showing them respect. Equally important, Christian husbands are to love their wives (see Col 3:18-19). Christian marriages become a reflection of the union and relationship between the Lord and the church. 5:22 Submission is part of the life to which the wives’ Christian commitment calls them (see 1 Cor 11:3-10; 14:34-35; Col 3:18; 1 Tim 2:11-12; Titus 2:5; 1 Pet 3:1-6).”
  8. Ephesians (Presbyterian) “Jamieson, Fausset & Brown on Ephesians 5 (introduction): EXHORTATIONS TO LOVE: AND AGAINST CARNAL LUSTS AND COMMUNICATIONS. CIRCUMSPECTION IN WALK: REDEEMING THE TIME: BEING FILLED WITH THE SPIRIT: SINGING TO THE LORD WITH THANKFULNESS: THE WIFE'S DUTY TO THE HUSBAND RESTS ON THAT OF THE CHURCH TO CHRIST. (Eph. 5:1-33) therefore--seeing that "God in Christ forgave you" (Eph 4:32). followers--Greek, "imitators" of God, in respect to "love" (Eph 5:2): God's essential character (Jo1 4:16). as dear children--Greek, "as children beloved"; to which Eph 5:2 refers, "As Christ also loved us" (Jo1”
  9. Ephesians (Presbyterian) “Jamieson, Fausset & Brown on Ephesians 5:22: (Eph 6:9.) The Church's relation to Christ in His everlasting purpose, is the foundation and archetype of the three greatest of earthly relations, that of husband and wife (Eph 5:22-33), parent and child (Eph 6:1-4), master and servant (Eph 6:4-9). The oldest manuscripts omit "submit yourselves"; supplying it from Eph 5:21, "Ye wives (submitting yourselves) unto your own husbands." "Your own" is an argument for submissiveness on the part of the wives; it is not a stranger, but your own husbands whom you are called on to submit unto (compare Gen 3:16”
  10. Ephesians (Baptist/Reformed) “John Gill on Ephesians 5 (introduction): INTRODUCTION TO EPHESIANS 5 The apostle, in this chapter, goes on with his exhortations to the duties of religion; and such in general as relate to purity of life, and against uncleanness; and particularly treats of the duties of married persons. And whereas in the latter part of the preceding chapter, he had exhorted to kindness and tenderness, and which he enforced by the example of God himself, he here repeats and urges it; and to it adds the example of Christ in loving his people, and giving himself for them a propitiatory sacrifice, acceptable to”
  11. Ephesians (Nonconformist/Puritan) “Matthew Henry on Ephesians 5:21: Here the apostle begins his exhortation to the discharge of relative duties. As a general foundation for these duties, he lays down that rule Eph 5:21. There is a mutual submission that Christians owe one to another, condescending to bear one another's burdens: not advancing themselves above others, nor domineering over one another and giving laws to one another. Paul was an example of this truly Christian temper, for he became all things to all men. We must be of a yielding and of a submissive spirit, and ready to all the duties of the respective places and st”
  12. Ephesians (Nonconformist/Puritan) “Matthew Henry on Ephesians 5 (introduction): We had several important exhortations in the close of the foregoing chapter, and they are continued in this: particularly, I. We have here an exhortation to mutual love and charity (Eph 5:1, Eph 5:2). II. Against all manner of uncleanness, with proper arguments and remedies proposed against such sins: and some further cautions are added, and other duties recommended (v. 3-20). III. The apostle directs to the conscientious discharge of relative duties, from Eph 5:21, throughout this, and in the beginning of the next chapter.”
  13. Ephesians (Presbyterian) “Jamieson, Fausset & Brown on Ephesians 5:28: Translate, "So ought husbands also (thus the oldest manuscripts read) to love their own (compare Note, see on Eph 5:22) wives as their own bodies." He that loveth his wife loveth himself--So there is the same love and the same union of body between Christ and the Church (Eph 5:30, Eph 5:32).”
  14. Ephesians (Presbyterian) “Jamieson, Fausset & Brown on Ephesians 6 (introduction): MUTUAL DUTIES OF PARENTS AND CHILDREN: MASTERS AND SERVANTS: OUR LIFE A WARFARE: THE SPIRITUAL ARMOUR NEEDED AGAINST SPIRITUAL FOES. CONCLUSION. (Eph. 6:1-24) obey--stronger than the expression as to wives, "submitting," or "being subject" (Eph 5:21). Obedience is more unreasoning and implicit; submission is the willing subjection of an inferior in point of order to one who has a right to command. in the Lord--Both parents and children being Christians "in the Lord," expresses the element in which the obedience is to take place, and t”
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